Super Bowl Preview 2019

#4 MoRRie's Pogiboys (9-4) vs #7 Sweep the Leg Zabka (7-6)

After putting up a historic 107.0 points per game last year, Pogiboys come right back this season and topped their own record, scoring 109.1 points per game, resetting the new high mark for Maize and Blue -- we’ve been tracking this stat since 2013. (Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada put up 104.4 ppg this year, good for fourth overall historically.) Regular season accolades are de rigueur for they just can't seem to win the big one, even as recently as last year's disappointing Super Bowl XIIII showing. Can XV finally be their breakthrough?!

Pogiboys faced a real softball schedule this year, going against the second lowest PA this season, with opponents putting up just 77.7 PA. That gave the 2019 Pogiboys a historic +31.5 PF/PA each week. Impressive right? What’s more impressive is how Alvin managed to lose four games this season. Maybe he was trying to not get too far in the lead. (Interestingly, three of the top five PF/PA difference seasons were set this year, with Xur beating opponents by +25.8 and Another Bad Creation with +24.6)

Despite losing The Big House division title to Aaron’s The Autumn Wind in the last week of the regular season, Pogiboys wrapped up their last month with three wins and just one loss, and then came back strong to defeat TAW when they re-met in the first round of the playoffs. Having avenged that WK13 loss, Pogiboys advance to their fourth Super Bowl -- and first back-to-back showing -- after taking down Team Grrrrific in the Eastern Conference championships.

All that stands between Alvin and his long awaited title is one foe. Unfortunately, that foe is 2017 champ Sweep the Leg Zabka, and they have a history of big escapes and daring upsets. Despite a 1-4 start the season, Alan righted the ship by winning four straight from WK6-9, and the regular season on a 6-2 tear, and they’ve shown no signs of stopping after upending top ranked Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada in the first round off the playoffs and then winning an absolute nail biter versus Squirtle Squad last weekend. Seriously, that win was only by +2.5 points, and Alan has to be thankful for whoever the hell Terry McLaurin is. Heading into their third Super Bowl appearance in just their sixth season for Sweep is quite a feat.

They’ll be facing an uphill battle in the championship game as they were one of two teams to enter the postseason with negative PF/PA, and the largest at -9.1 per week. Is Drew Brees and Devonta Freeman enough to take down Patrick Mahomes, Nick Chubb, DeAndre Hopkins, and Travis Kelce? Plus that vaunted Patriots defense?

While every positional advantage seems to favor Pogiboys — plus a huge disparity in PF consistency — the meme spewing Zabkas aren’t afraid of anyone and if they can pull off their second title win against the long suffering Pogiboys, well…. this league might really need to be renamed to something other than Maize and Blue eh?

Playoff Results 2019: Matchups

RD1
Eastern Conference
#2 Another Bad Creation (9-4) vs #8 Team Grrrrific (7-6)
#3 The Autumn Wind (9-4) vs #4 MoRRie's Pogiboys (9-4)

Western Conference
#1 Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada (11-2) vs #7 Sweep the Leg Zabka (7-6)
#5 Squirtle Squad (7-5-1) vs #6 Pooh Bears (7-6)

Toilet Bowl RD1
#9 Stink Pink Gators (6-6-1) vs #16 P-Funk All Stars (3-10)
#10 Ann Arbor Bamfers (6-7) vs #15 Jedi Knights (4-9)
#11 Team Cameltoe (5-8) vs #14 Mandalorian Warriors (4-9)
#12 Fockers (5-8) vs #13 Italian Stallionz (4-9)


RD2
Eastern Conference Championship: #4 MoRRie's Pogiboys (9-4) vs #8 Team Grrrrific (7-6)
Western Conference Championship: #5 Squirtle Squad (7-5-1) vs #7 Sweep the Leg Zabka (7-6)

Toilet Bowl Matchup #1:  #12 Fockers (5-8) vs #16 P-Funk All Stars (3-10)
Toilet Bowl Matchup #2:  #10 Ann Arbor Bamfers (6-7) vs #14 Mandalorian Warriors (4-9)


RD3
Super Bowl: #4 MoRRie's Pogiboys (9-4) vs #7 Sweep the Leg Zabka (7-6)
Third place: #5 Squirtle Squad (7-5-1) vs #8 Team Grrrrific (7-6)

Toilet Bowl: #14 Mandalorian Warriors (4-9) vs #16 P-Funk All Stars (3-10)

Power Rankings 2019

Here are the final overall rankings from the season.   These power rankings represent the inverse draft order for next season, with the exception of the Toilet Bowl winner.

Playoff brackets have been updated accordingly.  There are three primary groups: Eastern Conference, Western Conference, Toilet Bowl.

Overall Power Rankings
1.  Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada (11-2) - Green and White Division Champion.  Best Overall Record.
2.  Another Bad Creation (9-4) - Mark Dantonizzo Division Champion.  Wins H2H vs The Autumn Wind.
3.  The Autumn Wind (9-4) - The Big House Division Champion.  Wins H2H vs. MoRRie's Pogiboys.
4.  MoRRie's Pogiboys (9-4)
5.  Squirtle Squad (7-5-1) - Ohana Division Champion.  Next best overall record.
6.  Pooh Bears (7-6) - Next best overall record. Wins tiebreak vs Zabka and Grrrrific via Total Points For.
7.  Sweep the Leg Zabka (7-6) - Wins H2H vs Team Grrrrific.
8.  Team Grrrrific (7-6)

Non-playoff Teams
9. Stink Pink Gators (6-6-1)
10. Ann Arbor Bamfers (6-7)
11. Team Cameltoe (5-8) - Wins tiebreak vs Fockers via Total Points For
12. Fockers (5-8)
13. Italian Stallionz (4-9) - Wins tiebreak vs Mandalorian Warriors and Jedi Knights via 3-way H2H winning %.
14. Mandalorian Warriors (4-9) - Wins H2H vs Jedi.
15. Jedi Knights (4-9)
16. P-Funk All Stars (3-10)


PLAYOFF MATCHUPS
Eastern Conference
Another Bad Creation (9-4) vs Team Grrrrific (7-6)
The Autumn Wind (9-4) vs MoRRie’s Pogiboys (9-4)

Western Conference
Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada (11-2) vs Sweep the Leg Zabka (7-6)
Squirtle Squad (7-5-1) vs Pooh Bears (7-6)

Super Bowl Preview 2018

After a round one of no upsets, we had Pogiboys take down top seeded Team Grrrrifiic behind a huge week from DeAndre Hopkins. Doomed by an untimely worst week by Saquon Barkley — plus Kareem Hunt’s bad mojo — Donny’s team wilted in the Western Conference finals as Pogiboys took advantage of a soft one-seed to make it to their third Super Bowl in six years.

Pooh Bears had a tougher matchup, as Matt Ryan, Alvin Kamara were almost enough to get Squirtle Squad the upset but Brian’s team was playing short-handed with Keenan Allen and kicker Aldrick Rosas coming up with zeros. Almost any other receiver -- or Jake Elliot as the kicker -- would have won Squirtles the day, but instead 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears slips into their fourth Super Bowl as the favorites. Let’s take a look at the matchups!

#1 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears (9-3-1) vs #2 MoRRie’s Pogiboys (10-3)
It’s been five years since Pooh Bears have won a ring, and they are itching for another — potentially their third. Unfortunately for Pogiboys, that last 2013 Pooh title was won at their expense!

From that 2013 team, only Cam Newton and Antonio Brown remain for Pooh, while Pogiboys have completely revamped their roster since the days of Tom Brady, Calvin Johnson, and Eddie Lacy. The good news for Alvin is that this represents a redemptive chance to win their first ring and they’ve been in two Super Bowls recently, in 2013 and 2016. And while they are technically the lower seed, they have been much better over the past month, rarely dipping below 100+ points from WK8 on. During that same period, 100AW have failed to reach one hundred points four times.

QB: Pogiboys have two options here: potential NFL MVP Patrick Mahomes or recent breakout 2018 #1 overall NFL pick Baker Mayfield. Haha, okay, it’s gonna be Mahomes. The tougher decision will what J and Jayvee do at quarterback, as Cam Newton looks injured and it seems like Deshaun Watson would be the safer pick. Either way, Mahomes should outproduce anyone Pooh can put into the lineup. Hopefully.

RB: It’s Ezekiel Elliot and David Johnson versus Tarik Cohen and rookie second-half sensation Nick Chubb. It would seem that Pooh’s Elliot and Johnson have the edge but all four backs have shown the ability for big games. Right now Ezekiel has been consistently better than the other three so we’ll give the advantage to Pooh Bears on the ground.

WR/TE: Hopkins literally won Pogiboys their matchup last week and it would be greedy to ask for another thirty-point explosion. Ditto for Doug Baldwin who caught two touchdowns last week — from the bench, since Dede Westbrook was the starter opposite Hopkins. Who gets the call at WR #2 for Pogi? It won't really matter since the pass catcher who needs to have a huge game is Travis Kelce, since that would mean Mahomes is having a similarly robust weekend.

Of course, Pooh is countering with Antonio Brown and Mike Evans, two top-ten receivers who could blow up any matchup in their own right. The drop off from Kelce versus David Njoku at tight end is too big to ignore though, so receiving edge to Pogis.

DEF/K: I can’t tell. The scoring is so wild this year that frankly, every DST is a toss up as far as I’m concerned. I guess on paper Bears defense and Stephen Gostkowski out-classes Vikings and Will Lutz? Khalil Mack and Co. get to feast on Nick Mullens though, so let’s just give Pogiboys the edge here.

Intangibles: 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears have an overall record of 125-69-1 (64.1%) since 2004, but Morrie’s Pogiboys are just a bit better at 132-59-4 (67.7%) over the past fifteen years. Pooh Bears have also dominated Ohana to the tune of ten division titles while Pogiboys have done the same to The Big House, with twelve division crowns of their own. In addition, both Pooh and Pogi have led the league in regular season wins four times each. If you’re asking, "yes, these are the two best (regular season) teams in Maize and Blue history."

So what separates them? Well, to put it kindly: 100AW Pooh Bears are winners. They’ve been to the Super Bowl in 2004, 2007, 2013, and now 2018, emerging with two rings so far. Pogiboys haven’t gotten a ring despite their 2013, 2015, and 2018 appearances. Not to mention, Pooh Bears won our inaugural Toilet Bowl in 2015 -- resulting in Elliot -- the only year they’ve entered it. Basically, Pooh Bears win, Pogiboys lose...

If there is justice in the world, Mahomes and Kelce go off for 60+ combined points and Alvin can have a celebratory Sunday evening as he watches his team finally grab a championship!

Playoffs & Toilet Bowl 2018: RD2

In what is likely a first, no higher seed was toppled in either the playoffs or Toilet Bowl. Pretty boring right? The good news is we'll get to see our best teams go at it for the right to showdown in the Super Bowl!

Eastern Conference Finals, RD2

• #1 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears (9-3-1) vs #2 Squirtle Squad (9-4)

Western Conference Finals, RD2

• #1 Team Grrrrrific (11-2) vs #2 MoRRie’s Pogiboys (10-3)

Just so it's clear, I updated the rules to say "Toilet Bowl is not conference exclusive, so we re-seed #9-16 regardless of conference. However, we keep the same matchups regardless of upsets, and don't re-shuffle each round. Ex) If #16 seed upsets #9 in RD1, they don't have to face #10 in RD2."

Toilet Bowl RD2

#1 Fockers (7-5) vs #4 Italian Stallionz (5-8)

#2 Hungry Hungry Ouroboros (6-7) vs #3 Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada (6-7)

Playoffs 2018: RD1

EASTERN CONFERENCE
#1 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears (9-3-1) vs #4 Stink Pink Gators (8-5)
The kings of the East racked up their tenth division title — their third-straight — and Pooh Bears are positioned once again to make a deep run in the playoffs. After getting upset in the first round twice in a row though, J and Jayvee have to be wary of what lurks ahead and won’t be taking any matchups for granted. They are on a 5-0-1 streak to end the regular season and average a MnB second-best 103.9 points per week. Ezekiel Elliot has been incredible over the past month, plus a semi-bounceback season from David Johnson, so there’s still too much talent on this team not to be afraid of Pooh Bears. Elliot, Antonio Brown, Mike Evans, and a wonderful season from Cam Newton make this the Eastern Conference’s team to fear!

Pulling off a 8-5 record despite a PF/PA split of 1168/1174 is not easy. That’s now two playoff appearances in a row for our sophomore owner and Dave will get the chance for a huge upset if they can pull themselves together for one more big week. Stink Pink came out of the gates red hot with six wins in seven tries — as well as seven 100+ PF in eight games — but have faded down the stretch some. The loss of AJ Green was obviously a huge blow mid-season, as was quickly losing pre-draft trade acquisition Jay Ajayi earlier in the year, but that alone can’t explain Gators’ dip. Still, with Carson Wentz throwing to Adam Thielen, Zach Ertz, and Jarvis Landry, an upset could be possible!

#2 Squirtle Squad (9-4) vs #3 Sweep the Leg Zabka (8-5)
Squirtle took out the top seed last year and find themselves facing off against the defending champs! After starting off 1-3, Brian has piloted this team to an 8-1 record the rest of the way and bolstered the roster through a handful of trades — mostly with Mandalorian Warriors. Squirtles picked up Duke Johnson, Juju Smith-Schuster, Matt Ryan, and James White at the Mandalorian Megamart, and George Kittle from Another Bad Creation. After losing James Connor — and Jimmy Garoppolo much earlier — Squad has replaced every moving part and is going to ride Alvin Kamara and his built on-the-fly contender into the playoffs. We love Brian’s aggression and hope it all works out as it’s been a looooong Super Bowl drought for Squirtles.

Not every defending champ gets the chance to defend their title in the postseason but Sweep the Leg Zabka has even picked up another Green and White division title by H2H tie-breaker over Stink Pink Gators to get their back-to-back journey off right. A 5-1 record to finish up the regular season means Zabka is in fighting form and looking for an elusive Maize and Blue repeat! It’s been a tough season too, as a slew of injuries have hit this team and Alan has had to unearth guys like Jared Cook and Tyler Boyd while Rob Gronkowski and Marvin Jones sat down. Drew Brees and Odell Beckham have really kept the champs afloat and there’s going to have to be more of that to get Zabka back to a Super Bowl.

WESTERN CONFERENCE
#1 Team Grrrrrific (11-2) vs #8 Ann Arbor Bamfers (6-7)
Our best team in 2018 used a league wide low PA paired with a fourth-ranked PF to rise from the depths of a 4-9 record last season to top of the charts this year! In just his second year, Donny has vaulted in the standings. Oh yeah, did we mention he won the Toilet Bowl last year and drafted Saquon Barkley? That probably had a lot to do with Grrrrific’s leap to the top. Donny was also proactive in recently trading for Russell Wilson, replacing IR-ed Andy Dalton in the lineup, shoring up that roster hole. However, the real issue facing Grrrrific is that Kareem Hunt has been cut by the Chiefs for physical violence and there’s also OJ Howard and Will Fuller on IR as well. Can Saquon, Wilson, Robert Woods, and a stiff Texans defense do enough to stave off upsets? Or will the karma from the Hunt fiasco tank this team? After starting out 0-2 and ripping off eleven straight wins and counting, we’re curious how this plays out for Donny.

Bamfers secured a third straight playoff appearance by taking out Ouroboros in WK13 behind a late surge from Golden Tate. After suffering through a five loss streak between WK7-11, Randy’s team pulled it all together for two solid wins. The big question now is what happens to Melvin Gordon and his health, as Bamfers would be left with only rookie Sony Michel in the backfield if Gordon can’t go. It’s been an up and down season for Bamfers but maybe Philip Rivers can deliver some postseason magic and get a huge upset here! (Congrats to Bamfers for edging my team out of the playoffs. My Slack overtures for Randy to lose WK13 were totally ignored…good play, good play)

#2 MoRRie’s Pogiboys (10-3) vs #7 Team Cameltoe (7-6)
After two nine-win seasons, Pogiboys came up with another double digit win season, as well as their fourth straight Big House division title — their twelfth overall. No pressure but this could be the best shot for Pogiboys in awhile to win a long coveted ring, as they led the league in PF at 106.7 per game, enter the postseason having won five of their last six, and also face a weakened number-one seed in their conference. If the emergence of Patrick Mahomes, Tarik Cohen, and rookie Nick Chubb (acquired via trade in October) — along with Travis Kelce and DeAndre Hopkins — can’t get Pogiboys a ring, well, it’s going to be another long offseason for Alvin…

What a strange season for Cameltoe as they started off 1-4, ripped off six straight wins, and then faltered down the stretch to lose their last two. Still, Felipe has used the Jared Goff to Julio Jones and Eric Ebron combo to return Cameltoe to the playoffs after a two year drought — and shipped off former franchise savior Russell Wilson during the season. They’ll be up against a tough challenge though, as they were shellacked by first round matchup Pogiboys last week, but maybe can take faith that they rose to the occasion in WK7 and scored 128.5 in a win vs Alvin’s team. Still, for at frachise that is often under 0.500, 2018's 7-6 record has to count as a win for Cameltoe already.

Power Rankings 2018

PLAYOFF TEAMS
1. Team Grrrrrific (11-2)  - The Knights Who Say Ni Division Champion.  Best Overall Record.
2. MoRRie’s Pogiboys (10-3) - The Big House Division Champion.  Next best overall record.
3. 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears (9-3-1) - Ohana Division Champion.  Next best overall record.
4. Squirtle Squad (9-4) - Next best overall record.
5. Sweep the Leg Zabka (8-5) - Green and White Division Champion.  Wins tiebreak over Stink Pink Gators via H2H.
6. Stink Pink Gators (8-5) - Next best overall record.
7. Team Cameltoe (7-6) - Next best overall record
8. Ann Arbor Bamfers (6-7) - Wins tiebreak vs Ouroboros via Conference Record (6-4 vs 4-6).

NON-PLAYOFF TEAMS
9. * Fockers (7-5) - Next best overall record among non-playoff teams
10. Hungry Hungry Ouroboros (6-7) - Wins tiebreak over Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada via Total Points For.
11. Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada (6-7) - Next best overall record.
12. Italian Stallionz (5-8) - Next best overall record
13. Another Bad Creation (4-9) - Wins tiebreak over Jedi Knights via Total Points For.
14. Jedi Knights (4-9) - Next best overall record
15. Mandalorian Warriors (2-11) - Next best overall record
16. P Funk All Stars (1-12) - Next best overall record

Super Bowl XIII

Before Sweep the Leg Zabka had even played a game in Maize and Blue, new GM Alan made a pre-draft trade in 2014 for Rob Gronkowski. Three years later, Gronk led Zabka to their very first title with a team leading 14.5 points! It’s been three years, three division titles, and a sterling 26-12-1 regular season record, plus a previous Super Bowl appearance for Alan in 2015 — in which they were upset by Another Bad Creation. It took a nail biting, come from behind victory, but Sweep the Leg are finally the titans of Maize and Blue, and we are now all under threat for a league name change as Alan represents the Spartans, who are like, another color or something.

After withstanding Todd Gurley’s explosive early Sunday, Sweep the Leg looked to be in dire straits as Zabka hurtled toward a sub-80 point week for the first time in a month. However, Gronk came through, Sammy Watkins caught a touchdown to score 10.5 points, and Bears defense held strong. Heading into Monday night, Sweep the Leg was up a mere 4.5 points, with a kicker versus wide receiver matchup. Long story short, Jake Elliot fended off Nelson Agholor, handing Alan the win, and giving the higher seed the championship for the first time since 2013!

Despite a poor scoring week all around, Alan’s first title showcased all his strengths as an owner. The constant wheeling and dealing — bringing in Drew Brees and Devonta Freeman this year — the uber confidence, the deep roster of unsightly JPEGs, Alan used all the tools at his disposal to bring home the ring. Overall, Alan has shifted pieces everywhere in his search for a title. Five trades in 2014, one in 2015, two in 2016, and four separate ones this year. (He seems to specialize in turning backup quarterbacks into draft pieces, including EJ Manuel, Mike Glennon, Ryan Tannehill, Eli Manning, and Jared Goff most recently.)

And aside from moves for now-champs Gronk, Brees, and Freeman, Alan has also brought in new owners Dave and Donny this past off-season, fine additions to our league. Plus Alan’s always been vigilant about trade deadlines and schedule screw ups. It’s safe to say that Alan has made his mark on Maize and Blue, and while he may hail from an inferior school, he’s number one in Maize and Blue! Congrats Sweep the Leg Zabka, you’re officially the biggest villain now!

• #2 Sweep the Leg Zabkha (9-3-1) def #4 Hungry Hungry Ouroboros (7-6), 77.0 - 72.5

On the other side, Hungry Hungry Ouroboros had a sterling upset filled playoff run, their first in MnB, but celebrated little too early behind Gurley’s 43 points. As the entire Dallas offense wilted away, Das Prescott and Jason Witten combined for a mere 10.5 points and then to add insult to injury, the pre-playoff trade for #1 ranked Jaguars defense resulted in a -3 score in the championship game. With only Gurley and kicker Kai Fortbath scoring in double digits, Ouroboros couldn’t capitalize on Gurley’s historic fantasy playoffs and instead will take home a “thanks for playing” participation trophy and settle for the closest Super Bowl in MnB history. Wah wah.

Super Bowl Preview 2017

Since coming aboard in 2014, Alan has stamped his Sweep the Leg Zabka as a franchise to be feared. They’ve made the playoffs in every season they’ve played and reached the Super Bowl in 2015 (before getting upset by Another Bad Creation). They’ll have to look to avoid another upset as they face off in another #2 vs #4 matchup, this time versus title game neophytes Hungry Hungry Ouroboros.

Jon’s team entered Maize and Blue in 2012, taking over for the defending champs, but since then has gone 23-42 in five seasons, before finishing 7-6 this year and squeaking into the playoffs — despite losing their last three regular season games. However, once there, they’ve upset both #1 and #2 seeds in the Western Conference and might have the gas for one more victory. Let’s take a look at the matchups.

QB: Drew Brees has been steady as ever, albeit a tad less than spectacular this season, while Ouroboros’ Dak Prescott has been wildly up and down, swinging between low single digit outings and high twenties. The consistency edge has to go to Sweep the Leg here.

RB: It’s been a rotating cast of castoffs for Alan this year at running back, with their highest scoring RB being Devonta Freeman, whom they acquired in early November for the stretch run for the price of two future RD1s and a RD3. Freeman didn’t even see the field until three weeks ago but he looks poised to have a good championship game. Will he be able to match Todd Gurley’s MVP-like season? No, but he could be similarly explosive. Behind Freeman, there’s literally nobody else as Alfred Morris, Terrance West, Marlon Mack, Jonathan Stewart, Damien Williams, and Rob Kelley all had a cup of coffee this year for Zabka and all will be quietly benched.

As for Ouroboros, they have Gurley, and some success with Jerick McKinnon, and traded for Isaiah Crowell late, but it looks like rookie Joe Mixon will get the start after missing two weeks with a concussion. For a team that whiffed on two huge trades — acquiring the now injured Dalvin Cook and the inconsistent Mixon — Ouroboros’ running game is in decent shape, based on the strength of Gurley.

WR: There’s no question about it, Zabka has the edge here. Marvin Jones has quietly been a top twelve receiver and while Sammy Watkins and Kelvin Benjamin haven’t exactly thrived on their new NFL teams, they have been more than serviceable. The loss of Odell Beckham Jr early in the season hurt Alan’s team of course, but they’ve recovered well. As for Hungry, a rotating cast of boom-or-bust receivers have led them to feature Nelson Agholor, Will Fuller V, and Robert Woods for most of the season, but aside from Agholor, it hasn’t been especially dependable. Ouroboros is choosing to go with Paul Richardson over Corey Coleman or similar trash.

TE: It’s Rob Gronkowski versus Jason Witten. Haha. This is probably the matchup that gives Zabka the title this year, just saying…

K/DEF: Normally we don’t cover DEF or K that much but since Ouroboros made a special effort to trade for #1 defense, Jacksonville, a month ago, this would be the game for them to step up and prove they were worth the price. Of course, Bears defense faces of against the Browns so there’s a chance Zabka evens this edge out. The two kickers, Kai Forbath versus Jake Elliot, are basically a wash.

Prediction: Zabka by ten, and a new title holder for Maize and Blue either way!

Playoffs & Toilet Bowl 2017: RD2

Both #1 seeds from the two conferences went down, and with a thrilling #2 vs #3 match in the Eastern Conference that resulted in a one point win by the higher seeded Sweep the Leg. Let’s see who’s headed to the Super Bowl!

WESTERN CONFERENCE
• #2 MoRRie’s Pogiboys (9-4) vs #4 Hungry Hungry Ouroboros (7-6) 

EASTERN CONFERENCE
• #2 Sweep the Leg Zabkha (9-3-1) vs #4 Squirtle Squad (8-5)

As for the Toilet Bowl, we had three upsets, with only top seeded Fockers surviving against underdogs. Farewell (consolation) champagne for Team Cameltoe, Jedi Knights, and Mandalorian Warriors, it looks like Fockers could have a clear path to a top pick!

• #1 Fockers  (7-6) vs #7 Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada (2-11)
• #5 Team Grrrrific (4-9) vs #6 Italian Stallionz (4-9)

Playoffs 2017: RD1

 WESTERN CONFERENCE
#1 Another Bad Creation (10-3) vs #4 Hungry Hungry Ouroboros (7-6)
Tied for the best record in the league, and with their first division title since 2011, our 2015 champs are really back! (They won the title in 2015 with a losing record.) Riding a four game win streak into the playoffs, ABC is counting on Kirk Cousins and Michael Thomas to hook up for big plays, and then finish off foes with the punishing power of 2017 #1 overall Leonard Fournette.

Speaking of Fournette, who ABC traded up for, it’s fair to say that Hungry Hungry Ouroboros got the short end of the stick between Fournette (1.1) and Joe Mixon (1.4). And let’s not forget, there was also the unfortunate trade of Kareem Hunt (1.6) for Dalvin Cook (1.3) right before WK1, which blew up in GM Jon’s face immediately. But no matter, Ouroboros rode Todd Gurley and a rotating roster of nobodies to their first playoff appearance, albeit as the lowest seed on the table. Prediction: Upsetsville!

#2 MoRRie’s Pogiboys (9-4) vs #3 Ann Arbor Bamfers (7-6)
After making the Super Bowl last season, and wining their third straight division title — making eleven total — regular season success is now old hat for Pogiboys. A pre-draft trade for Matt Ryan mostly worked out, and a late season move for Larry Fitzgerald was spectacular. With premium options like DeAndre Hopkins, LeSean McCoy, and Travis Kelce at WR/RB/TE, Pogiboys is poised for another deep playoff run.

The Bamfers stumbled through a bad WK9-11 but came back with two strong wins at the end of the year to play their way into the playoffs. They’ll face off against the team that bounced from last season’s post-season again, and hope they can pull off the upset this time around behind Philip Rivers and Melvin Gordon. Thank goodness it’s an away game though, as Bamfers probably get more support on the road if they’re anything like the real Chargers.


EASTERN CONFERENCE
#1 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears (10-3) vs #4 Squirtle Squad (8-5)
Back-to-back 10-3 seasons, two years of the best record in the league (tied this season), and a ninth division title. Yawn… Pooh Bears were upset in the first round last year after two years in the Toilet Bowl — including a Toilet Bowl win in 2015 — so they’re hoping for a return to their post-season winning ways too. However, with a Ezekiel Elliot suspension finally enacted, it could be a weak point despite a roster that boasts Antonio Brown, Brandin  Cooks, Mike Evans, and Cam Newton. (Imagine if David Johnson and Deshaun Watson hadn’t been hurt…)

Squirtle isn’t afraid of top seeded Pooh Bears because they already stomped on them in WK13, which gave them a playoff berth — after missing out last year. Can Brian’s team double down and ride Tom Brady, a finally healthy Keenan Allen, and the rookie stylings of surprise best rookie RB Alvin Kamara to a huge first round upset? With five straight wins under their belt, Squirtles are the hottest team in the league and are poised as a dark horse.

#2 Sweep the Leg Zabkha (9-3-1) vs #3 Stink Pink Gators (9-4)
One team led the league in points scored with almost exactly 100 points per week, the other had the softest schedule in the conference — plus a crucial tie to give them the division title. The latter team is Sweep the Leg Zabkha, who is now on a streak of back-to-back-to-back division titles and is looking for another Super Bowl appearance after getting to the big game two years ago. With their only three losses coming against fellow top teams this season — including a WK11 loss to Stink Pink — there’s a possibility that Sweep the Leg is good but not quite great. And with Rob Gronkowski suspended for the week, it could be an uphill battle for this “favorite.”

As for Stink Pink, they racked up multiple weekly $5 wins and are riding a strong four game win streak into the playoffs. With an explosive offense headed by underrated Mark Ingram, MVP candidate Carson Wentz, and ROY challenger Adam Thielen, rookie owner Dave’s powerhouse team led the league in scoring and are the real threat coming out of Green and White division despite being an underdog -- and could take out the owner that brought them into Maize and Blue in the first place! Looks like the success of Detroit Players carries on in Stink Pink Gators!

Power Rankings 2017

PLAYOFF TEAMS 
1. 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears (10-3) - Ohana Division Champion. Best overall record. Wins tiebreak vs ABC via H2H.
2. Another Bad Creation (10-3) - The Knights Who Say Ni Division Champion.
3. Sweep the Leg Zabka (9-3-1) - Green and White Division Champion. Next best overall record.
4. MoRRie’s Pogiboys (9-4) - The Big House Division Champion. Wins tiebreak vs Gators via H2H.
5. Stink Pink Gators (9-4) - Next best overall record.
6. Squirtle Squad (8-5) - Next best overall record.
7. Ann Arbor Bamfers (7-6) - Wins tiebreak vs Ouroboros via H2H.
8. Hungry Hungry Ouroboros (7-6) - Next best overall record.

NON-PLAYOFF TEAMS 
1. Fockers (7-6) - Best overall record amongst non-playoff teams.
2. Team Cameltoe (6-7) - Next best overall record.
3. Jedi Knights (5-8) - Next best overall record.
4. Mandalorian Warriors (4-8-1) - Next best overall record.
5. Team Grrrrific (4-9) - Wins tiebreak vs Stallionz via H2H
6. Italian Stallionz (4-9) - Next best overall record.
7. Xur and the Ko-Dan Armada (2-11) - Wins tiebreak vs All Stars via Total Points For
8. P Funk All Stars (2-11) - Next best overall record.

Super Bowl XII

Well well, what started as a water balloon fight between Fockers and Pogiboys early (Fockers were leading big on Saturday), turned into a knife fight later (as Travis Kelce went wild), and then escalated into a tense duel by Monday Night Football as Dez Bryant went mano a mano against the Detroit Lions to determine who would take home the Maize and Blue championship this year. Well, Dez had only one catch and 19 yards early on, but he soon turned it up a notch and eventually gathered four total passes for seventy yards. And had three touchdowns, including a one-handed grab. And threw for a score to boot. In the end, Fockers needed 2.5 points on MNF and got 25, making Super Bowl XII a blowout by the final score, but we all know it was closer than that... A nail biter to the very end!

As we predicted last week, Fockers had the edge across the board but Pogiboys matched Fockers punch for punch. Blake Bortles outscored Andrew Luck. LeSean McCoy wasn’t far behind LeVeon Bell. Sure, Alvin’s Bears defense lost seven points, but Hong’s Dolphins were negative two also. And even though Jimmy Graham and LeGarrette Blount turned in nice games — while DeAndre Hopkins and Demaryius Thomas were both pretty much M.I.A. — the career 27.5 point game from Kelce pushed Pogiboys into the lead come Sunday night. A win would have given Pogiboys their first title, after losing in their lone previous Super Bowl appearance in 2013. Alvin had to be sitting at home, hoping Bryant wouldn’t suit up for Monday night, as he had a large red “Q” next to his name. But alas, we know what happened next…

• #7 Fockers (7-6) def #4 MoRRie’s Pogiboys (9-4), 110.0 - 87.5

For Fockers, it’s been a culmination of a long path for them toward championship status. GM Hong came into the league with a lot of aplomb in 2012, taking over day-to-day operations for Eric. After a season of seasoning, Hong completely took over a struggling Human Amoebas franchise in 2013 — losing records in four of their last five seasons — and went 7-6, 10-3, 5-8, and 7-6 since, with two postseason appearances, one The Wood division title, and two Super Bowl appearances. Impressive stuff. And the cherry on top was this title, which was so poetic because it was in 2015, coming off his first Super Bowl appearance, that Hong pushed all-in for Dez Bryant. Five picks (including two first rounders) and one 5-8 season later, Hong was likely regretting his move. But the fantasy gods reward boldness, and Bryant was the hero of this title story, just one year later.

In fact, master gambler Hong has proven that he’s got the golden touch in many of his moves. There was the trade away of Matthew Stafford — keeping Andrew Luck — that netted him Demaryius Thomas. And then there was the 2013 #1 overall selection of LeVeon Bell, who has been one of the best fantasy players since. Hong assembled so much talent that his Fockers were given the mythical title of “best keeper core” heading into 2015, and it was only that one year dip that prevented them from capturing a title earlier.

We called this year's 7-6 Fockers our potential playoffs dark horse and now they've come through with three brilliant playoff wins and a shiny new ring!!! How about we remove that asterisk now? The Fockers are the no-asterik best team in Maize and Blue, congrats!

As for Morrie’s Pogiboys, the story remains the same: great team but can’t get over the hump. Despite having a load of regular season success over the years — and now two Super Bowl appearances — Alvin keeps getting upended by Another Bad Creation or an upset minded Super Bowl challenger. With four Hoke-A-Mania division titles in the last five years — an astounding ten division titles overall — it’s old hat for Pogi fans to celebrate September through November and then get their dreams crushed in December. If the Cavs and the Cubs can end their title droughts, why can’t Morrie’s team?! Better luck next year Alvin, and we’ll be rooting for your first championship soon.

Super Bowl Preview 2016

#4 MoRRie’s Pogiboys (9-4) vs #7 Fockers (7-6)
We're gonna have a first time champion, as Alvin and Hong both took care of business in the conference finals, defeating their lower seeded opponents. And now the two ex-Funktion members face off in a Super Bowl that will be mostly determined on Christmas Day! Who's going to receive a lump of coal and who's going to get a shiny new ring!? (Everyone paid up their dues yet?) Let's go to the tale of the tape...

QB: It’s Andrew Luck versus Blake Bortles, which on paper sounds like one of the biggest mismatches in championship game history. And while Bortles has only topped double digits in one of his last three games, it’s not like Luck has been overly spectacular recently, with only 16 and 18 points in his last two outings. Still, Luck versus Bortles is no competition. (Is there a chance Pogi rolls the dice with Robert Griffin III?!) EDGE: Fockers

RB: Once upon a time, Alvin’s team had Eddie Lacy as his lead back, but now his running game relies on a rejuvenated LeSean McCoy and um, not much else. Duke Johnson will likely get the start but he’s basically a five point guy, unless he can sneak in a touchdown. Fockers features two top ten backs in LeVeon Bell and LeGarrette Blount. Both are locks for double figures and there’s no telling what Bell is capable of on a week by week basis. Even with McCoy cancelling out a big day by Bell, Blount versus Johnson is a win for Hong’s backfield. EDGE: Fockers

WR: Again, on paper this is a no brainer: Dez Bryant and Demaryius Thomas versus DeAndre Hopkins and Chris Hogan (or possibly John Brown or Sammie Coates). Alvin will have to choose which secondary receiver he’d like to gamble with, while Hong will have the luxury of two #1WRs to just leave in his lineup. Dez and Demaryius face tough defenses but that shouldn’t prevent them from outscoring Hopkins and whoever lines up next to him. Also, Dez plays on Monday Night, which could have big implications if this game gets tight...  EDGE: Fockers

TE: Now we’ve got a real competition! Travis Kelce has really come on recently, with four great games in his last five — all 100+ yard efforts — while Jimmy Graham has been erratic at best. The top end for both of these guys may be similar but Kelce has demonstrated a lot more consistency and explosiveness to close the season. Could a tight end lead Alvin to the promised land? He may have to count on it! EDGE: Pogiboys

DEF: While Pogi’s Bears defense has put up some nice games recently, they’re going to be facing off against an explosive Washington offense at just the wrong time. There’s a possibility that these Bears could even pull of a negative score, which they’ve done in three straight weeks, WK10-12. On the other hand, Fockers’ Dolphins defense is coming off two good weeks, and face a Bills team in snowy Buffalo that could keep the score low, giving the Dolphins at least a respectable fantasy score at the end of the day. EDGE: Fockers

K: To be honest, both kickers could be better here, as Hong’s insistence on holding onto a Chargers kicker, Josh Lambo, has resulted in only about four points per game in the last month. Lambo should have been replaced weeks ago. But it’s not like Dan Carpenter has been incredible either, although he seems at least capable of reaching 8-9 points this week. EDGE: Pogiboys

Prediction: Despite being the lower seed, Fockers is the heavy favorite here, with an edge in every key position, save tight end. Fockers are in the best position to grab their first title, and aside from a mega-flop from the Bell and Blount combo, we’re looking at an easy double digit win and champagne in the OC by Sunday night. Let’s just hope there’s no blog curse….

2016 RD2: Upsets-ville

What a week, as nearly every top seed — minus Pogiboys, who was barely a home team — won their matchups in upsets that rocked the post-season! Let’s take a look at which of these underdogs could be on their way to the Super Bowl!

#4 MoRRie’s Pogiboys (9-4) vs #6 Another Bad Creation (8-5)
By the time Chris Hogan hit MNF, Alvin had already wrapped up his upset win, behind LeSean McCoy and Blake Bortles. Now they’ll face off against our defending champs, who sleepwalked through a 55-32.5 win versus P Funk All Stars. With that dirty week off the board, ABC will need more heroics from last year's playoff MVP, Kirk Cousins, to lead the way. Or will the only top seed left in the tournament -- and winner of four straight -- Pogiboys dish out enough firepower against a ABC team that hasn’t gone over 67 points in two weeks. A playoff win here would be nice for Alvin, as ABC has eliminated Pogiboys in the first round in 2012 and 2015.

#7 Fockers (7-6) vs #8 Detroit Players (7-6)
The Fockers blasted #2 seed Sweep The Leg Zabka by over thirty points behind LeVeon Bell’s 49 big ones. Detroit Players meanwhile, escaped a matchup with 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears behind Breshad Perriman’s 6.5 point MNF effort, securing a tight three point victory. Which of these 7-6 teams will move onto the Super Bowl? The big names are all on Hong’s side — Bell, Andrew Luck, Dez Bryant, Jimmy Graham, Demaryius Thomas — but there’s always a chance that Jameis Winston can produce a miracle upset, but he’ll need Jeremy Hill to continue his strong running efforts. The Players haven’t had much playoff success since 2008 — when they won the title — but with a long awaited post-season win under their belts, they could be gaining momentum for another ring.

Toilet Bowl RD2 Matchups [Edit: Corrected 12/18/16]
#10 Mandalorian Warriors (6-7) vs #16 Shoguns of Harlem (3-10)
#12 Squirtle Squad (4-9) vs #14 Hungry Hungry Ouroboros (4-9)

Playoff Matchups 2016

Half of our eight playoff teams are returning from last year, and three of them are former champs. Who will win it all this year?!

#1 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears (10-3) vs #8 Detroit Players (7-6)
Pooh Bears took a title three years ago and after two years out of the postseason, are poised to do it again. As the only team to average over 100+ per game — 105.8 ppg to be exact — Pooh Bears have the power running duo of David Johnson and Ezekiel Elliot, as well as Cam Newton tossing the rock to Antonio Brown and Mike Evans. It’ll be next to impossible for Detroit Players to pull an upset here, as they enter the playoffs with a negative PF/PA number — and no AJ Green. However, by winning four of their last five games, Players should just be be happy to be here. A #8-1 upset would be mighty sweet though!

#2 Sweep the Leg Zabka (9-4) vs #7 Fockers (7-6)
After entering the league in 2014, Zabka has made three straight post-season trips, and was the Super Bowl runner-up last year. They had a seven game winning streak — before a dud in WK13 — and have the suddenly good Latavius Murray to bolster the run game next to Drew Brees, Odell Beckham, and Jamison Crowder — although losing Rob Gronkowski hurts them. The Fockers have a recent Super Bowl appearance of their own, two years ago, and are dangerous with three wins -- all 100+ games -- in their last four matchups. Andrew Luck, LeVeon Bell, and Dez Bryant are a formidable trio, and this team also features LeGarrette Blount, Demaryius Thomas, and Jimmy Graham for additional depth. Is this our playoffs dark horse?

#3 P Funk All Stars (9-4) vs #6 Another Bad Creation (8-5)
A 7-2 start slid into a 2-2 finish, but P Funk has been steady all year behind the Derek Carr and Amari Cooper combo, and took The Knights Who Say Ni division title. With literally no running game — starter Darren Sproles is basically a receiver — Cooper will have to be joined by DeVante Parker and Donte Moncrief on the scoreboard to power this team to playoff success. (Another home team with a great road record, 5-0, versus a so-so home record, just 4-4.) While ABC couldn’t capture another division title, they still have a shot to go back-to-back. While they seem a bit underpowered on paper. Kirk Cousins proved his championship season last year was no fluke and he’s got the explosive Terrelle Pryor and Michael Thomas to throw to — where did Stefon Diggs and Jordan Reed fade off to? It’ll have to be a true team effort for Another Bad Creation to defend their title.

#4 MoRRie’s Pogiboys (9-4) vs #5 Ann Arbor Bamfers (9-4)
A thrilling WK13 matchup determined the Big House division title this year, as LeSean McCoy and Bears DST held off Bamfer’s Golden Tate and Melvin Gordon. And now these team will have an immediate matchup to determine who moves onto the next round. The slight edge might go to the underdog Bamfers actually, as Philip Rivers and Gordon are a nice combo, as Pogiboys has Blake Bortles at the helm…of the Titanic (or do they roll the dice with Robert Griffin?!). The key matchup may be Travis Kelce versus Delanie Walker at the tight end position. After missing the playoffs for the past two years, a first round win would sure be nice for Randy’s team.

Power Rankings 2016

Playoff Teams
1. 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears (10-3) - Ohana Division Champion. Best Overall Record
2. Sweep the Leg Zabka (9-4) - Green and White Division Champion. Next Best Overall Record. Wins tiebreak over P-Funk and Pogiboys via Most Points Scored.
3. P Funk All Stars (9-4) - The Knights Who Say Ni Division Champion. Wins tiebreak over Pogiboys via H2H.
4. MoRRie’s Pogiboys (9-4) - The Big House Division Champion. Wins division tiebreak over Bamfers via Best Division Record.
5. Ann Arbor Bamfers (9-4) - Next Best Overall Record
6. Another Bad Creation (8-5) - Next Best Overall Record
7. * Fockers (7-6) - Next Best Overall Record. Wins tiebreak over Players via H2H
8. Detroit Players (7-6) - Next Best Overall Record

Non-Playoff Teams
9. Italian Stallionz (6-7) - Next Best Overall Record. Wins tiebreak over Warriors via H2H
10. Mandalorian Warriors (6-7) - Next Best Overall Record.
11. Team Cameltoe (5- - Next Best Overall Record
12. Squirtle Squad (4-9) - Next Best Overall Record. Wins tiebreak over Jedi/Salt/Ouroboros via common winning % (among the 4)
13. Jedi Knights (4-9) - Next Best Overall Record. Wins tiebreak over Salt/Ouroboros via common winning % (among the 3)
14. Hungry Hungry Ouroboros (4-9) - Next Best Overall Record. Wins tiebreak over Salt via H2H
15. Original Salt (4-9) - Next Best Overall Record
16. Shoguns of Harlem (3-10) - Next Best Overall Record

Road to Super Bowl XI

Sorry to have missed the first two rounds of the playoffs, but I blame the Sith! Okay, I haven’t even watched Star Wars yet, but I will soon, right after I do these articles. Let’s take a look at the journey to Super Bowl XI! Over in Eastern Conference, two upsets took Pogiboys and Jedi Knights spinning into the abyss. Both games weren’t very close and Jedi’s higher seed was a technical one, as they had a worse record than Team Cameltoe, who was only a lower seed due to not winning a division.

In fact, lower seeds won all their games in the first round, except Sweep the Leg Zabka edging out Detroit Players. With two #4 seeds in play, plus the rebuilding yet somehow still dangerous Mandalorian Warriors lurking in the West, we headed to round two.

When we got there, ABC upset their way yet again! They took out Cameltoe behind a stiff Patriots defense and TE Jordan Reed having a second 20+ pt game. Cameltoe’s kicker and defense combo netted zero total points and that’s all she wrote for Felipe’s team, despite stellar performances from Russell Wilson, Ted Ginn Jr., and Julio Jones. As for Sweep the Leg Zabka, our confident sophomore year owner took their seven game win streak and added one more by blowing out Mandalorian Warriors by a measly +87.5 points. Ouch. Midseason trade acquisition Aaron Rodgers faltered for Warriors but it wouldn’t have mattered against the explosive days by Sammy Watkins and Chiefs defense.

So here we are, Super Bowl XI with a #2 and #4 seed about to face off. Last year we saw a low seed streak their way to a championship and it would be sort of exciting to see Another Bad Creation duplicate those efforts behind a 7-2 record since WK7, including five straight wins heading into the big game. Then again, wouldn’t it be cool to see a new owner rebuild their team in just two years and take the ring home? Keep in mind, Odell Beckham Jr. probably won't be able to suit up for Zabka, and that could be the difference in this title matchup!

Note: And let’s talk about that midseason trade some more, well actually, let’s talk about all of ABC’s trades, which was supposed to have them in pure rebuilding mode this season. Yeah, we said this when they were 4-7: "Unless ABC can win out, they could miss the playoffs altogether." Overall, Oliver shipped off LeSean McCoy, Marshawn Lynch, and Aaron Rodgers while securing basically eight hundred more draft picks. Now they're in contention for their third title (2004, 2009). If this works, it’ll be quite an incredible story won’t it?

ROUND ONE

• #4 Another Bad Creation (6-7) def #1 MoRRie's Pogiboys (11-2), 80.5 - 67.5
• #3 Team Cameltoe (10-3) def #2 Jedi Knights (8-5), 132.0 - 67.5

• #2 Sweep the Leg Zabka (8-5) def #3 Detroit Players (7-6), 93 - 83.5
• #4 Mandalorian Warriors (6-6-1) def #1 Squirtle Squad (10-2-1), 84.5 - 78

CONFERENCE FINALS

• #4 Another Bad Creation (6-7) def #3 Team Cameltoe (10-3), 100 - 92.5
• #2 Sweep the Leg Zabka (8-5) def #4 Mandalorian Warriors (6-6-1), 131.5 - 44

2015 Final Power Rankings

Playoff Teams 
1. MoRRie's Pogiboys (11-2) - The Moose Knuckle Division Champions. Best Overall Record
2. Squirtle Squad (10-2-1) - Ohana Division Champions. Next best overall record.
3. Team Cameltoe (10-3) - Next best overall record .
4. Sweep the Leg Zabka (8-5) - Sum Dum Goy Division Champions. Wins tiebreak vs Jedi Knights via Total Points Scored
5. Jedi Knights (8-5) - The Knights Who Say Ni Division Champion. Next best overall record.
6. Detroit Players (7-6) - Next best overall record
7. Mandalorian Warriors (6-6-1) - Next best overall record
8. Another Bad Creaation (6-7) - Next best overall record

Non-playoff Teams 
9. Shoguns of Harlem (6-7) - Next best overall record. Wins tiebreak vs Pooh Bears via H2H
10. 100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears (6-7) - Next best overall record
11. Italian Stallionz (5-8) - Next best overall record. Wins tiebreak vs Ouroboros/Bamfers/Fockers via H2H% among tied opponents (1.00 x .33 x .5 x 0.0)
12. * Fockers (5-8) - Next best overall record. Wins tiebreak vs Ourboros/Bamfers via Total Points Scored
13. Hungry Hungry Ouroboros (5-8) - Next best overall record. Wins tiebreak vs Bamfers via Total Points Scored
14. Ann Arbor Bamfers (5-8) - Next best overall record.
15. Original Salt (3-10) - Next best overall record.
16. P Funk All Stars (2-11) - Next best overall record.

Playoff Seeding
Eastern Conference 

1. MoRRie's Pogiboys (11-2) - The Moose Knuckle Division Champions.
2. Jedi Knights (8-5) - The Knights Who Say Ni Division Champions.
3. Team Cameltoe (10-3)
4. Another Bad Creation (6-7)

Western Conference 

1. Squirtle Squad (10-2-1) - Ohana Division Champions.
2. Sweep the Leg Zabka (8-5) - Sum Dum Goy Division Champions.
3. Detroit Players (7-6)
4. Mandalorian Warriors (6-6-1)

Super Bowl Preview

Fockers (10-3) vs Original Salt (6-7)
Alright! Another upset by Reno’s team as Original Salt upended fellow upsetter Team Cameltoe, 65 - 47, on the way toward their first Super Bowl since an appearance in 2008. It’s been a difficult past couple of years for Original Salt (formerly known as Rhythm Drive), but if they can pull of another upset, they’ll have one of the greatest underdog playoff runs in Maize and Blue history.

As for Fockers, they’ve been the model of going from pretender to contender since Hong took over the reins in 2012. They’ve made all the right moves, including trading for Demaryius Thomas, drafting Le’Veon Bell, keeping Andrew Luck over Matthew Stafford, and even scooping up favorite Charger, Antonio Gates in another low key trade. We can even overlook their recent curious trade of a 2018 RD1 for Chris Ivory. (“It was a mistake, I didn’t see that a pick was involved...” GM Hong said when reached for comment.) After neatly dispatching Shoguns of Harlem in the conference finals, 80-71, a championship is in sight, as Original Salt has taken care of all of *Fockers main rivals.

Fockers averaged 87.9 points per game this regular season, leading the league and hitting the magical DeLorean number. Original Salt averaged 67.5 ppg and snuck into the playoffs with a losing record. Still, throw everything out the window because Reno’s team could be destined for victory! Let’s look at next week’s matchup...

QB: Andrew Luck versus Ben Roethlisberger. There’s a chance Jay Cutler could sneak a start here, but we’re assuming it’s Big Ben who will take charge for Original Salt, because who wants their title hopes on the line with Cutler leading the way? Roethlisberger is having a career year, and threw those two games of six TDs each, but he’s not the #1 overall ranked player like Luck is. Comparison over. EDGE: Fockers

RB: We love Matt Forte, who is consistently underrated. His stats will rise even more when next year’s half point PPR kicks in, but Forte was already the #5 RB this season. He’s been a little erratic lately, but he should show up in the biggest game of his life. Fockers will counter with Le’Veon Bell, who has emerged in his second season as the best back in the NFL. His last four games have resulted in 27, 30, 41, and 23 points. So yeah, we’ll give the edge to Bell. EDGE: Fockers

WR: Outside of a WK14 blip, Demaryius Thomas has put up double digits every week since WK5. He’s #3 on the WR charts and won’t be slowing down any time soon. Thomas is a monster. Across from him will be Salt’s Roddy White, who has had a nice bounceback season, but White isn’t in his prime anymore, and he’s only capable of low double digits. Neither team has a solid number two receiver, unless you think Anquan Boldin or Doug Baldwin are worth talking about. So yeah, it’s basically the top options we’re looking at here. EDGE: Fockers

TE: Original Salt’s best tight end, Jermaine Gresham, is sitting the bench due to injury, and his replacement, Jordan Cameron, has scored eight points total since WK7 with seven scoreless games since. That’s not good. Especially when Fockers get to suit up Antonio Gates, who is still a top five option, depsite a string of weak games recently. Still, Gates will likely get more than zero points, which means Reno will be essentially playing seven on eight for the title game. EDGE: Fockers

DEF/K: Yes, we’re comparing defenses. I mean, Salt’s Ravens defense has put up 11, 2, 10, and 21 points over the past month, so they could be more important than almost any non-QB/RB for Reno’s team. They’ll be playing a putrid Texans team next week, so that could be a fantasy bonanza. Fockers have a stiff defense of their own though, the Rams, who have scored three TDs in four weeks, and get to go against the turnover prone Giants in WK16. Pretty even. Buuut, Fockers have lost their kicker, Billy Cundiff for the season, and so they’ll be playing one man down — neatly making up for Jordan Cameron. Robbie Gould has been hurt for Original Salt, but Reno had the foresight to pack Josh Brown as a backup kicker before the post-season roster lock. EDGE: Original Salt

Prediction: While we love upsets, it’s hard to call this for anyone but Fockers. We predict a twenty point blowout, with Reno having a ten percent chance of a crazy upset. Can this long shot take out Hong, the king of gambling? Do you believe in Luck or luck?!