Tuesday, October 1, 2013

East Conf Early Look: The Wood

With three 3-1 teams, The Wood is once again the toughest division in Maize and Blue. With a new owner on board, it's even got some fresh blood in the water. Put it this way, the worst team in the division is multiple champion Squirtle Squad, who acquired their most recent title in 2010. Let's take a look to see how all these potential powerhouses are faring early on this season. Last season's early The Wood look.

100 Acre Wood Pooh Bears (3-1)
In the toughest division in the land, the Pooh Bears still rule, albeit barely, just a few more points scored than their challenger. Unlike most other teams, J's team is led by a tight end, the very best non-QB fantasy player in the land: Jimmy Graham. Having a competitive advantage with a guy who's averaging 20 points a game on three hundred yard games and six total touchdowns is pretty fantastic. It's bought time for a running attack that has been slow to gel. Doug Martin has been getting the work but not a lot of scores, and Ray Rice has been pretty non-functional all season. This could be worrisome for other teams but the Pooh Bears haven't exactly been hurting for points as they are strong everywhere else. I mean, look at that keeper core.

In a slight twist, Cam Newton and Michael Vick have been splitting time equally, with J unfortunately missing out on all of their big games. It looks like it'll be Vick for WK5, which is something we couldn't have predicted during pre-season. The uptempo offense has Dez Bryant and Antonio Brown performing as top ten WR options, and rookie Kenbrell Thompkins is starting to find his footing after two fantastic games. With three straight games at 90+ points and above, and WK4's 109-98 win against the defending champs, J's team is looking to rule The Woods yet again.

Italian Stallionz (3-1)
Trailing not that far behind and nipping at J's heels is Porta's team. They've had some roster churn but aside from one hiccup, a WK2 low scoring affair against Ann Arbor Bamfers, they've taken care of business. Porta's team have squeaked out a one and six point win while featuring a group of six starters who all average in double digits. Impressive stuff. Their off-season swap at quarterback -- Matt Stafford for Tom Brady -- has resulted in slight upgrade so far this season too. With Jamaal Charles locking in top running back status, the Stallionz lead with a heavy ground attack. A surprising Bilal Powell has been getting a lot of touches and since only fifteen running backs average ten points or more a week, Powell at 10.3 per game has translated into very solid RB#2 status. He's made up for the early season struggles of Stevan Ridley.

The receiving group of Anquan Boldin, Reggie Wayne, good looking rookie DeAndre Hopkins, and Tony Gonzalez have traded off big games to useful effect. None of them have been star caliber but they don't need to be. We see the Stallionz remaining a solid contender all season, and how sweet would it be to have a championship to top off a marriage? (I hope someone got Porta drunk at the bachelor party and made him promise to trade me Jamaal Charles!)

* Fockers (3-1)
Undergoing a questionable name change, co-owner Hong has gone from the catchy "Human Amoebas" to the eye rolling "* Fockers." He told me some explanation for the asterisk but really, who cares? The good news is that the Fockers are making a strong case for their contender status. After only winning six games total last year, they're well on pace for much more than that. Their one loss this season was by seven points, in WK1 to the Dunder Mifflin Paper Company. Pundits would point to their league easiest schedule but Hong's team has been putting the points up on the board so it's not their fault when the competition wilts.

The off-season debate of Andrew Luck versus Matt Stafford has been almost an exact wash points-wise, and there's no question that Demaryius Thomas, received in return for Stafford, has been totally worth it. Thomas is currently sitting pretty as the second best wide receiver on the strength of two huge games. Pierre Garcon has been averaging seven catches a week, and he's emerged as a very nice secondary target. There's a glut of one-and-done receivers here too -- Cecil Shorts, Jerricho Cotchery, Robert Woods, Santonio Holmes -- any of which could catch fire for the occasional game.

As for the run game, it's on the upswing. First overall pick LeVeon Bell returned from injury with two huge TDs, and he'll make up for the hugely disappointing Montee Ball. The Trent Richardson trade really hurts Ahmad Bradshaw's value too. DeAngelo Williams has been getting a lot of carries in Carolina but hasn't sniffed the end zone yet. We hear rumors that GM Hong could soon address his gaping hole at tight end too, which might help this * Fockers challenge for the lead in this heavyweight division. Check out how Coach Hong does his lineup each week, that's so cute!

Squirtle Squad (1-3)
After wiping out last year with three straight losses, Brian started off 2013 by losing a super close game in WK1 and then earned a hard fought nail biting win in WK2 versus Cameltoe. Things were looking up! Then came a minor collapse that had the fans revisit their sinking feelings from last year. Is it as bad as it looks? I mean, there's Adrian Peterson on this team, the best non-QB non-Jimmy Graham player in the league at 19 points per game. And look, there's TE Julius Thomas who set the world on fire in his first two games of the season -- before fading badly recently. Plus there's so much intriguing talent here with young receivers Randall Cobb, T.Y. Hilton, Josh Gordon, and even Marlon Brown. What gives?

The biggest hole has been at quarterback, otherwise known as the Ryan Tannehill experience. Tannehill hasn't been that bad -- no worse than Eli Manning, Andy Dalton, Joe Flacco, Carson Palmer -- but when you start the 24th best QB in a sixteen team league, that's a deficit each week. Perhaps new find Brian Hoyer will help, he of the two eighteen point games in WK3/4. There seems to be a plethora of TEs too, with Thomas, Martellus Bennett, and Charles Clay around. How many top eight tight ends does a team need? Also, who is Dion Lewis and why is he on IR? Super savvy move for next year? Oh la la. The Squirtles are building for the future and likely not a post-season contender.

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